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| 05:59am 24/01/2005 |
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mood:  blah music: i don't kno who sings it...
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okay, so when your up super early and have nothing to do on a snow day, yah always can resort to these....
( nothing exciting )
okay, so that was a complete waste of time, but i don't feel like updating about my boring life. so im gonna go talk to mick, shower and just relax. peace out |
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| ...i hope you had the time of your life |
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| 09:04am 16/01/2005 |
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mood:  confused music: Green Day
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I haven't updated in over a month and a half. Things have been crazy since then. My aunt passed away which was really hard to deal with, but I got through it all. Another aunt was in the hospital with a heart attack. I have to have an ultra sound and some tests done on my kidney's next week. My dad was in the hospital for a possible heart attack. Joe Berg just passed away. CVS sucks a lot and I need to find a new job. But yah, some things have been good. I got accepted to Nichols College to study Business Management. I have been talking to a lot of old friends again which is making me happier. Then there is everything with Tom. I dunno how to look at it all, good or bad. But yah, it's a learning experience and I am hoping everything comes out the best, cuz I love the kid. But yah. Softball batting practices started and thats okay I guess, nothing too exciting. Been going to the track meets every week. Watched dodgeball last week with Stacy, pretty fun time. I duno, maybe I should go work on some finals stuff and I will try to update again soon. Peace out. |
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| lift yourself |
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| 03:20pm 22/11/2004 |
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mood:  tired
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At the moment, i am content but confused and i dunno what about or why. but yah, gonna go and do nothing, update will be later.
>Do You Have...
Any sisters: val
Any brothers: no
Any pets: a dog and a cat
A disease: i hope not
A personal phone number: nah
A leather jacket with studs on it?: cant say that i do
A heroin needle: nope
A Car: yah
Describe Your...
Personality: bitchy.. nice.. happy.. i dunno, its a mix of things
Driving: haven't killed anyone yet
Room: blue and i share it =)
School: sucky..
Relationship with your parents: good
Do You...
Believe in love at first sight?: no
Consider yourself a good listener?: yep
Consider yourself a good friend?: yah
Get along with your parents: usually
Save your e-mail or conversations: some
Pray: nope
Like to make fun of people: no, unless they are my friend and they did something dumb
Like to talk on the phone: not really
Get motion sickness: at times
Eat chicken fingers with a fork: no
Type with your fingers on home row: no, not usually anyways
What Was/Is (or Are)...
Right next to you: a fan
On your mouse pad: i don't even kno where it is
Your dream car: i want a mitsubishi eclipse or pontiac grand am... nothing special
Your bedtime: whenever
Under your bed: boxes
The single most important question: Will you marry me?
Your bad time of the day: at night when i get restless and grouchy
Your worst fear(s): being alone, being stabbed/shot
The date?: 11.22.04
Your scariest moment?: i dont remember
Craziest thing that's ever happened while with your friend(s)?: a lot of different things
Favorite...
Number: 23
Color: orange
Day: saturday
Month: July
Song: --
Movie: Dirty Dancing.. walk to remember
Season: Summer
Class: accounting
Drink: mocha coolatta
Veggie: Cucumbers
TV Show: 7th heaven, gilmore girls, boy meets world, one tree hill
Radio Station: 94.5
Store: American Eagle
Animal: kittens or mini yorkshiere terriers
Flower: rose i guess... the one i got on my coursage for prom!
Love + Relationships...
Do you have a bf?: yah
Do you have a crush?: my bf
Why do you like this person?: he's amazing
The Past...
Last thing you heard: the theme song for boy meets world
Last thing you saw: a sock
Last thing you said: hey val
Who is the last person you saw?: val
Who is the last person you kissed?: thomas
Who is the last person you hugged?: thomas
Who is the last person you fought with?: thomas
Who is the last person you were on the phone with?: my mom
What is the last TV show you saw?: boy meets world |
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| blargh |
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| 02:43pm 19/11/2004 |
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I really don't feel good, it's not just a physical thing, its more of, well everything. i dunno, i messed up. i know i have, i dunno how to fix it. things are okay i guess, but i feel like crap. i got a 1060 on my sat's, so now its a 1080, not very good, but whatever. i think im gonna go walk the track and think a bit, i dunno. maybe an update later.
i love you thomas lee |
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| i want ice cream... heavenly hash |
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| 03:49pm 13/11/2004 |
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mood:  cold music: Smashmouth
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Yesterday was good and bad. School sucked, as usual, very boring. After school I just hung around here with Tom til the game. Went early to take pictures cuz it was snowing and I liked it. I got some good pics I am excited about. Talked to some people. It was senior night so all of the parents were there and stuff. Good time. Matthew sang the national anthem. Chilled with katie and Stacey, made a good plan for the T-Day game =) But then evil happened and Tom got hurt in like the 1st quarter but still played and in the 3rd I had to leave to bring him to the hospital. We met his mom there. Got out around 11. He seperated his shoulder, I feel so bad. But today I got sent home from work cuz I am sick and I have been lazy all day. Tonight is a party and then tomorrow, who knows. But I am gonna go and try to do something productive.
<3 thomas lee |
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| week 3- still sick |
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| 07:57am 11/11/2004 |
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mood:  sick music: Saved By the Bell theme song
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Haven't updated in quite a while. Things are going good. Tom's bday was last Saturday. School is getting even more boring. We have today off for Veteran's Day. It's 8 and I am up, blargh. I had to bring Tom to practice, but it's cool cuz now I can color =) Coloring relaxes me and makes me feel better. Things are surprisingly going really well with everything. I think I know what I wanna do with my life, I think. lol. I saw Michael when we all went to wright's for tom's bday....23 of us, hehe. But yah, he was there and he made me happy. But yah, one of these things then color time... byebye ((i'll try to update more))
I love you thomas lee.... with all of my heart <3
( haven't done this in a while )
Yah, i dunno. im tired now and sore and yuck. buh bye! |
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| blargh |
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| 02:16pm 04/11/2004 |
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mood: groggy
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Dunno what to tell yal.
im sick, which sucks cuz i feel yucky and get grumpy.
i love my boyfriend to death. his bday is saturday =)
school is okay. nervous about college.
i think i might know what i wanna do with the rest of my life.
softball soon.
work sucks.
<3 i love you <3 |
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| 02:49pm 29/10/2004 |
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Today I did something dumb and acted stupid, I am sorry and hope you forgive me. |
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| take my hand... |
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| 02:58pm 28/10/2004 |
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mood:  thirsty music: Dare You to Move- Switchfoot
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I haven't updated in a while and I figured maybe I will. Lately things have been very very good. Things with the boy are awesome. Things with school are going good with a few classes in the exception. College is going to be a pain in the ass and hard to deal with. I think I am only gonna apply to like 3 schools, but I am pretty sure I know where I wanna go, if all goes well, which I am happy about. Tom's bday is in 9 days, which I am excited about, it should be a really good time. Friends, well thats a different story. The ones who are there are there and the ones who aren't, I don't really care at this point. Family is good, can't complain too much. Work is okay, only working 2 days this week, which is good cuz I get it all done with in those 2 days and can do whatever I want the rest of the week. I just talked to Mike which I haven't done in quite a while and that made me happy. Kid works way too much, but he's doing good. Softball started last week and that definately makes me a lot happier and relieves a lot of my stress, hopefully I will stay healthy and improve this winter, cuz I really wanna do good. I am in the mood to go out and take pictures, I don't know why or what of, but I wanna. Everyone is talking about the Red Sox, and I am not goona. Congrats to them tho. I think I am gonna go and do a few english papers and my physics. I'll update more later.
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| =) |
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| 11:45am 24/10/2004 |
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mood: tired music: usher and alicia keys
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Waking up to your face is like a dream come true...
Okay so today is me and tom's 8 month. it has been such an amazing experience. i love you.
Friday I went to the Northbridge vs. Burncoat game in Worcester. Brought Brittany and Katie, it was a fun trip up there and we had a singalong on the way home. The game was a good one and it should have ended a different way, but whateva. Uhmm some comments were made that pissed me off beyond belief and I came to the conclusion that I just don't give a damn anymore, and you know who you are. You've changed, well you were like this before just not as bad, and I don't wanna have to deal with it anymore. Call me a horrible friend, I don't care anymore.
Yesterday I went to Nichols College with Tom. It was nice. I dunno if I wanna go there or not tho. Stopped at Eblens. Came home for a while then left to go to wright's for my cuzins bday party. That was a trip. Then back here for the sox even tho I fell asleep.
This morning I had practice at 10. It was just a short one and pretty pointless. Met a few new people and such. Now I have to write my english paper that I am going to end up putting off for as long as I possibly can, lol. Nothing much really going on later, just sitting here in an empty house, kinda weird but nice at the same time. gotta get my work schedule for next week.
I love you Thomas Lee <3 |
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| poopies |
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| 02:21pm 20/10/2004 |
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mood:  sore music: AvRiL lAvIgNe
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I haven't updated in quite a while. Things are going well. Tom is here and it's wikid awesome. I love falling asleep and waking up with him here =) I love the kid. 8 months this Saturday, hehe. But yah. School is good i guess. I don't think it;s gonna really change. I am glad it's senior year tho. I dunno really what to say, sum school work to do. I started working at CVS in uxy yesterday, I'm not a huge fan of the job, but wateva. Going to Nichols Saturday with Tom and my dad and mom and such. Wright's Saturday night for my cuzin's sweet 16 bday. Sunday we start practice for the 18 under softball team. Uhm, yah I am gonna go and do some school work. Leave comments, I like them =) Byebye
I love you thomas lee |
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| 03:41pm 06/10/2004 |
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( complete boredom )
today was okay i guess. i think i may have narrowed down the schools to 3. my mom is being dumb and i can't stand it anymore.
i love you thomas lee |
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| we were meant to live... |
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| 03:50pm 05/10/2004 |
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mood: sore music: Kelly Clarkson- Break Away
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So Tom's family decided they weren't gonna move ot Texas so they returned Saturday morning which was so awesome. He came over at like 6 cuz they had to unpack everything and whatever. Spent the evening with him. Sunday I chilled with Tom's family and watnot, that was fun, watched the game and basically just was happy that Tom was actually here with me. Monday school was pretty good. Everyone was hugging Tom and everything, it was so good to see everyone happy he was here and kno he was happy that he is back here. Went and talked with a woman from Nichols, it actually could be a possibility to go there maybe, seems like a nice school, but I dunno really. Today wasn't too bad I guess. Just a very long day. Classes were boring. Went to Balmer for block 7 and all I really did was seperate papers and then me and Tom brought them to all the classes. I need to get going on the whole application process and figure out where I wanna go to college, cuz I am not sure. I need to also start rewritting my college essay cuz the one I already wrote sucks. I dunno, I wanna go to a good school and get a good education and everything. I wanna study Business Management I think. It seems like it would be a fun job or something, I dunno. I'm looking at all state schools. I kinda wanna play softball, but I dunno if I would even be able ot play D3. I dunno. We will see i guess. Speaking of softball, it starts back up this weekend. I am happy about that, it takes my mind off of things and makes life much easier. Football game in Auburn on Saturday at 2. Should be fun. Homecoming next weekend, just going to the day, kinda all set with the dance. I dunno, haven't made a real update in a while and just checkin in I guess. I am gonna go watch a few minutes of the Sox then go get Tom from practice. I will update more soon.
I love you Thomas Lee <3 |
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| 01:38pm 02/10/2004 |
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mood:  dorky music: break away- kelly clarkson
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weird how things change so much and so fast
<3 |
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| 08:00pm 30/09/2004 |
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mood:  crappy music: Dashboard Confessional
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fuck everything i said in the last entry.
the most important person who has ever stepped foot into my life (besides my mommy) is on his way to live in Texas unwillingly for the next 5 weeks. it is killing me to see him and his sisters have to do that. i mean, it's just so dumb and pointless and blah, i could og on for hours.
im done with that.
i love you thomas lee |
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| love me for me |
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| 07:04pm 28/09/2004 |
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mood:  happy music: Avril Lavigne
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Awwwww fuck yah bitches.
I am such a happy girl right now.
You are so fucking hott and so amazing.
I love you to death thomas lee.
Things are awesome!
I miss some people like woah!
*mouahz* |
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| <3 |
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| 06:37am 28/09/2004 |
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time is narrowing down and things are getting closer and closer. but i gotta be strong... i gotta be strong for you. i love you with all my heart.
weekend was tough. we made it through it. this week will be tougher and the 5 after thta even harder. i hope everything goes well today.
i love you thomas lee |
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| i love you |
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| 06:43pm 23/09/2004 |
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mood: sad music: Dashboard
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Time is dwindling and things are just get harder to deal with. I am really gonna need friends through this all, and I hope that the people who read this will make sure that I don't isolate myself more than I am already. i don't know, it's so hard to be in love and have that taken away from you. And I feel that I have no one to turn to, and the ones I want to turn to, I can't.
Lately all of my updates have been sad and pretty much about the same thing. Sorry for that, it's just the most important thing to me and yah, it sucks.
I got Tom's senior pic today. What he wrote on it made me smile, laugh and cry. It was odd.
I hate this feeling. It makes me feel horrible that I could ever feel this way. The things I'm going through will hopefully make me a stronger person. What has scared me the most, I have never been like this before. I have never cared and things couldn't break me down. Now I am a freaking wreck and in love with an amazing person. It's so weird.
I wanna go to Maine to see ym cousins so bad. I miss them so much. I don't want them to move to Arizona, specially before I get to see them. I want to go and talk to my cuzn, she understands me. I need her right now.
I wanna see Michael. I miss him so much. He is my big bro. I need him now more than ever, and it sucks.
I want my friends back. I need them back. I have messed up. There are people I wanna be friends with, but can't.
Tomorrow night is the football game in Bartlett. I am driving out there, cuz I wanna see my boy play. I hope they do well and win.
I wanna spend the night with Tom. I just wanna be... happy I guess.
Whatever i can't type more cuz he's the only thing on my mind. So I'm gonna go.
Possible road trip to Texas too. Fun stuff.
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| 06:23am 23/09/2004 |
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mood: thirsty music: i'll be- edwin mccain
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my senior pics are in... leme kno if you want one cuz i don't even kno who to write them out to =)
i love you |
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| ice cream is sticky |
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| 08:06pm 19/09/2004 |
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Meh, don't bother reading it...
Okay, so things just get worse and I am waiting til I actually hit rock bottom cuz if I haven't yet, I should be within days. While all the stress sits on me with colleges and school and applications and what I want to do with the rest of my life, I have the possibility of the best thing that has ever happened to me have to leave me for 5 weeks which is sooo hard for me to deal with and then I get thrown on top of it all, my cuzin and her 2 daughters and husband are moving to fucking Arizona. This makes me soooo mad. I love those guys to death and granted they live in Maine now, so I don't get to see them all that much, but I mean, when will I ever get to see them if they are in Arizona? I have come to also realize that the friends I once did have, I no longer do. I have like completely shut everyone out and it was good for a while, cuz it made things easier, but now I just, I dunno. I realized the other night there are so many people I am glad that I have been staying away from, but there are a few that I want to see and spend more time with. I wanna go away to school, but at the same time I wanna stay in Mass.
Sorry, big rant.. I'm done.
I love you. |
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softballfreak41's journal